spatch: (Admit One)
Carolyn and I went to the Mendon Twin Drive-In tonight. The double feature was Speed Racer and 10,000 B.C. but we left after Speed Racer because honestly after seeing it at a drive-in, there was really not much else that could top it. Plot? What plot? It was about Speed Racer and he likes to drive in races and if he wins this one it's a good thing, ok. That's all you need to know except Christina Ricci is like a cross between Trixie and Triana and that's all right by me.

It's a Wachowski Bros. flick, so the appropriate analogy to draw here is the one where I say the race scenes are like the cool stuff happening in the Matrix (that guy just threw a snake at that other driver!) and everything else is like the boring stuff happening in Zion (why do we care about races influencing stock prices?) But the race stuff is really trippy and I mean that, stuff melts and leaves trails and is all candy-colored and stuff, so you know it's kinda fun and hey where did my sugar cube go?

Also, Inspector Detector totally looked like Edward James Olmos from Blade Runner. Seriously. It couldn't have been a coincidence. I was hollering "IT'S TOO BAD SHE WON'T LIVE!" near the end, which was perfectly allowed, because we were in a car.

Would you like some pictures? Okey dokey.

Mendon Twin Drive-In Entry Booth Drop the coin right into the slot Mendon Drive In Screen 2

Wait, where's Grimace?

Grimace is stuck in the claw machine

oh hey sup
spatch: (Admit One)
So last night I saw THE HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL and not the groovy one from 1959, I'm talking the remake from 1999 with Taye Diggs and Geoffrey Rush of all people and I really am all going, like, what? about it and stuff. Okay I am going to tell you the story of the House on Haunted Hill okay so sit down and listen.

Written in CAFFEINE-O-RAMA )

Still, I had more fun watching FROM DUSK TIL DAWN a few nights earlier. But I would totally ride a roller coaster with Lisa Loeb any day. Over and over and over and over again. You know how to reach me. Let's make this happen.
spatch: (bewitched)
"You know what I think, Mr. President?"
"What's that, Elvis?"
"I think it's time we killed ourselves a mummy."
  - Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis

"Oh holy shit, that was the best exchange ever."
  - the guy sitting behind me in the theater
Bubba Ho-Tep gives you that Being John Malkovich feeling at the end -- you've just seen something incredibly fucked up, and you may not fully understand what you just saw right then and there, but you do know that you ain't gonna see a film like it ever again. One part creepy to one part bizarre to one part profound to one part monster movie. Add a gigantic scarab-like cockroach and stir. )
spatch: (spatch-side)
You know, it's a shame because with its pointless action sequences, horribly inane one-liners masquerading as dialogue, cheap special effects budget and unusual enough premise, LXG or whatever could have been a decently mediocre summer action vehicle.

If only there wasn't such an incredibly creative and unique publication that it co-opted in order to happen.

so this entry is old -- I waited until I didn't have to pay full price to see it )

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