history's unsent telegrams, vol 1

after careful consideration I've come to the conclusion that your idea of 'bad cinema' sucks

There appear to be some in this world of ours who seem to have forgotten that there's two components to the term "science-fiction." The first component is, of course, "science." The second component is "fiction." Both components are often up for debate, granted, but "fiction" usually means "something that didn't really happen." When it comes to writing fiction that mirrors current or almost-current events, artistic liberties are often taken in the name of a good story.

When it comes to fiction in movies, liberties are often taken so as to make the film as accessible to as wide an audience as possible. For there are two components to the term "show business" as well; the first being "show" and the second being "business." To ensure Butts In Seats and box office revenue, you must make sure the film can appeal to a wide range of your target demographic. This is not always a good thing, as you run the risk of alienating those to whom the subject matter is relevant. But this is not always a bad thing, either, for you wish to engage as many people as possible (who will also hopefully tell their friends!) It's a terribly fine line to walk, but when a nice balance is achieved, you have a hit on your hands.

This partly explains why I was pretty darn chagrined when I saw this listing in the program events for Arisia 2007:

SATURDAY 11:30 PM or whenever masquerade ends
WARGAMES -- SPECIAL EXTRA-BAD MOVIE

Teenage cracker uses his IMSAI to start the atomic destruction of the world. The Legion of Doom describes this film as "Puerile and offensive to hackers." Richard Stallman says, "I don't get my kicks from that sort of movie." Absolutely devoid of any redeeming content or even a tiny vestige of technical accuracy, this film provides a little nostalgic glimpse of a more naive world. This movie is presented in conjunction with the Institute for Very Bad Cinema.

Hold up there. Extra-Bad Movie? Very Bad Cinema? You have a treasure trove of poorly-made, poorly-shot, low-budget boredomfests just ripe for the picking and you select this as your crowning glory?

( I'm sorry, but you rubes wouldn't know a bad film if it sat up and bored you for 3 hours. )

I wonder what they'd think of COLOSSUS: THE FORBIN PROJECT, by the by. That film is one of my favorites, and anyone who disparages it should get a sock in the eye.