spatch: (spatch-side)
[personal profile] spatch
Written on Eschwa in response to others saying "Well, maybe I should go see Gigli, I mean, it can't be all that bad, can it?"

Aug 14, 2003 7:45 from Spatch
I feel like I'm a parent trying to explain to the kid why you shouldn't stick a
metal knife in the electrical socket.

"Don't do it, OK? It'll hurt you real bad. It's dangerous."
"It can't be that bad! Maybe it tingles real good before you get electrocuted."
"No. It doesn't 'tingle real good' before you get electrocuted. If it did,
word would get around and more people would be doing it."
"Well can't I do it anyway?"
"No. Listen, it's just a stupid idea. You've come up with far better ideas in
your stocking feet."
"But I really really really wanna know what's so bad about it!"
"Well, listen. Do you remember the time you licked that 9-volt battery?"
"Oh yeah, and you told me I couldn't have any toys that ran on batteries
anymore."
"Sure did. Now, do you remember how you felt after you licked it?"
"You mean after I licked it quickly or after I kept it on my tongue for 20
seconds?"
"After you kept it on your tongue for 20 seconds."
"I felt kinda sore. And I couldn't feel my tongue for a while. And I don't
think I can taste salt again yet."
"Well, that's what sticking the knife in the socket will do, only multiply that
by a hundred."
"Oh, fuck."
"I thought I told you not to use that language inside."
"Er, sorry. I'll go out and holler it now."
"That's a good lad."

[Movie Cinemaddicts> msg #12615 (2 remaining)]

(no subject)

Date: 2003-08-14 04:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cheezdanish.livejournal.com
Hahaha, nicely done.

I think you should put that in a portfolio and send it to the heads of all the studios.

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