BURNING QUESTIONS

[spatch]

By Cap'n Spatch, Age 30

How can anyone in good faith recommend a restaurant in the Wisconsin Dells that sells shirts that say "I GOT CRABS AT CRABBY'S" and advertises its location as "Behind the BP Station"?

I'm just checking.

Comments

Keith

[(Anonymous)]

How could you NOT recommend such a restaurant?

I'm gonna have to look for it the next time I'm over there.

Re: Keith

[spatch]

Okay, but if you suddenly develop an urgent need for penicillin, don't come running to me.

Re: Keith

[(Anonymous)]

Penicillin. Running. I get it.

Ack!

Re: Keith

[bedfull-o-books.livejournal.com]

True. They've got a gimmick. And sometimes the best restaurants are located "behind the BP Station"....

Then again, how far is the Wisconsin Dells from the ocean? Hmmm.....

If you do go, be sure to post a full report.

[dskasak.livejournal.com]

Given that this is the same town that has a bar called "Nig's," which sells shirts that say, "Take a swig with Nig," I am not surprised at anything tacky that originates in Wisconsin Dells. As an aside, I live four blocks away from one of the largest brick-painted signs in the city, which advertises bingo at Ho-Chunk Casino. I don't live near a bunch of old people who would want to trek over 150 miles to play bingo when a neighboring church basement will suffice. Still, that sign further cements the Dells as a vortex of tact in the Midwest.

[betweenstations.livejournal.com]

Well, they can go to Dejope Bingo, which is just south of Madison, too.

[ubiquity75.livejournal.com]

Spatch, I checked out Mt. Olympus the other day and talked about you while doing so. We're going to have to go.

Wisconsin Dells is unbelievable in its tackiness. It's like Myrtle Beach without the ocean.

[spatch]

There's something about cruising the main drag in Myrtle Beach with one's brothers, saying "Hey" in 5 syllables to all the ladies going by.

I so want to ride the Hades coaster at Mt. Olympus. So so so so so so want.

[wahhappen.livejournal.com]

So so so so so so NEED.

And you'll always have a place to stay in WI, dear!! :D

[betweenstations.livejournal.com]

Honey, because it's the Dells.
The Dells are a space-time anomaly.

[kleric.livejournal.com]

"Come see Tommy Bartlet's ANIMATRONIC CRABS"

[spatch]

TOMMY BARTLETT'S DEAD

Keith

[(Anonymous)]

Yet lives on through the miracle of Animatronic Technology.

See the Dells! Ride the Ducks!

[skatiemom.livejournal.com]

I read that and shrugged. It's the Dells and The Dells are all about the tackiness. The Dells don't do class EVER.

[spatch]

That's true. I just had to advise a family that, uh, no, you're not going to find a Thai restaurant in the Dells.

But if you want to eat pancakes in a restaurant shaped like a riverboat so that "you'll feel like you're dining on the water, but you're not!" then boy howdy, do I have a suggestion for you.

[wahhappen.livejournal.com]

I think they have an Indian restaurant though (and no, not Native American LOL)!! And yes, there is a Chinese restaurant across the street. :)

Not a direct response

[skypizza.livejournal.com]

I came across this, thought you might find it of interest:

http://www.harrymccracken.com/registerpeanuts.htm

-- Ivan

AARRRRRRGH!!

[redtheblue.livejournal.com]

Cap'n Spatch! There's a DUCK headed straight at us, bearing E-SE!

It's the Slopjar! She's skippered by the dread pirate Ian Continents, Cap'n! The Scourge of the Dells! Shall we close for battle, sir?

[glowkitty]

Well, I doubt everyone who goes there actually eats there. They probably make more money on the doodads.

[roody.livejournal.com]

I just think it's funny that several of you seem to know Wisconsin Dells better than I do. Sure, I've been there, but it's like I let any of the images sit in my brain for very long.

[morgaine723.livejournal.com]

Dude, it's the Dells. There is no why. Just tacky schwag.

[lafleuve.livejournal.com]

Hi there, this is Alexandra, I was your ticket taking partner. Sorry it took me a few days to find you back.