oh, and...
Aug. 8th, 2005 12:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
spatch00. Apropros of absolutely nothing that's been written earlier today no sir I have this particular Elementary schoolyard taunt stuck in my head, all singsong-like:
01. I also realized today that, when you think of it, "velveeta" is a truly obscene word. That is all.
Kindergarten babyIt's no Ogden Nash -- I mean, really, rhyming "baby" with "gravy" and later on, "Navy"? At best, one can describe it as a flawed masterwork. No doubt some 7-year-old was very proud of themselves the day they chose to denigrate their Kindergarten brethren and sistren (sistern?) but the fact remains that I can't for the life of me remember the third, and probably critical, line in the quatrain. All I can come out with is "wash it out with sauerkraut" and while it's a nice advanced internal rhyme, it just doesn't jibe as it should. Any suggestions?
Stick your head in gravy
Something something something something
And sell it to the Navy
01. I also realized today that, when you think of it, "velveeta" is a truly obscene word. That is all.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 05:11 pm (UTC)It even feels right -- the same person who rhymed "baby" with "gravy" could just as easily pinned "wash it off" and "applesauce" together, yes!
Yes!
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 05:12 pm (UTC)Now this is the part where I'm supposed to be surprised at who finally comes up with the right taunt, right?
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 05:19 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 05:39 pm (UTC)This reminds me of the pat-a-cake song for pottymouth little girls (like yours truly, back in my day):
Miss Lulu had a steamboat
the steamboat had a bell
Miss Lulu went to heaven and
the steamboat went to
HELLO operator
please give me number 9
and if you disconnect me
I will kick your big
BEHIND the refrigerator
there was a piece of glass
Miss Lulu sat upon it
and broke her little
ASK me no more questions
tell me no more lies
the girls are in the boy's room
opening their
FLIES are in the country
bees are in the park
the boys and girls are kissing
in the D-A-R-K dark
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 05:41 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 05:50 pm (UTC)...
ASK me no more questions
tell me no more lies
Ms Suzy told me all of this
the day before she
DIED her hair in purple, dyed her hair in pink
died her hair in polka-dots
and washed it down the
SINK me in the ocean,
sink me in the sea,
flush me down the toilet,
but please don't pee on me!
....I like your version better. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 06:51 pm (UTC)...the boys and girls are kissing
in the D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K
Dark Dark Dark!
The dark is like a movie,
A movie's like a show
A show is like a TV set and that is all
I KNOW I know my mother
I know I know my pa(w)
I know I know my [Insert one of two options here]
Option 1: sister with the 40-acre bra!
Option 2: brother with his hair that's made of straw!
We also did a very complicated pat-a-cake thing with a McDonald's jingle:
Two all-beef patty special sauce lettuce cheese onions on a sesame seed bun. Big Mac!
Or something. I never ate the food, but by gum, I knew the song!
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-09 04:00 am (UTC)She died her hair all purple
She died her hair all pink
She died her hair all polka-dot
And washed it down the sink
I wish I had a penny
I wish I had a dime
I wish I had a boyfriend
Who kissed me all the time
My mom gave me a penny
My dad gave me a dime
My sister gave me a boyfriend
Who kissed me all the time
Then mom took back the penny
And dad took back the dime
My sister took back the boyfriend
And gave me Frankenstein [the scientist? oh, how I kid]
He made me wash the dishes
He made me wash the floors
He made me wash his underwear
So I kicked him out the door
I kicked him out of London
I kicked him out of France
I kicked him out of the U.S.A.
Without his underpants!
Oh god, that was painful to type, even.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-09 01:38 am (UTC)