Housemate Needed! 12/1 or sooner

[spatch]

Tis sad, but pheromone is moving out of the Hall of Justice at the end of November, and with her, all sorts of coolness and stuff. This means that Abbie the Cat is now looking for a third person to bother besides me and ratatosk, and maybe you're it or you know someone who's it. The details of it all are below:

If you want this choice position
Have a cheery disposition
Rosy cheeks, no warts
Play games, all sorts

You must be kind, you must be witty
Very sweet and fairly pretty
Take us on outings, give us treats
Sing songs, bring sweets

Never be cross or cruel
Never give us castor oil or gruel
Love us as a son and daughter
And never smell of barley water

If you won't scold and dominate us
We will never give you cause to hate us
We won't hide your spectacles so you can't see
Put toads in your bed or pepper in your tea

Hurry, Nanny, many thanks

Sincerely,
Jane and Michael Banks

Wait, that's the wrong one.

Here it is!

Details:

• Very close to Davis Square, also close to Ball Square and Tufts. Less than a five-minute walk to the T.
  
• on quiet street protected from traffic by a maze of twisty one-way streets, all alike
  
• $750/month plus utilities (steam heat powered by gas, so heat goes on gas bill)
  
• washer and dryer in unit
  
• gigantic, friendly cat with popular weblog (full disclosure: we are considering hiring a cleaning service to help deal with the gigantic amounts of shedding)
  
• 1.5 baths, dining room, living room, tv room (used to be fourth bedroom but shouldn't be; we managed to argue down the rent when switching to 3 people), pantry, two porches, storage space in basement and some under eaves
  
• driveway shared with downstairs neighbors -- we use it rarely

The apartment is most of the top two stories of a 2-unit house. It was built in 1910 and some things have not been renovated since, but overall it is in good shape.

The open room is reasonably large, faces the driveway, has the access to the eaves from its closet, and it doesn't share walls with the nearby bedrooms.

Who we are looking for:

• Carbon-based humanoid lifeform or reasonable robotic facsimile; sentience and free will a plus
  
• able to pay the rent
  
• non-smoker
  
• cat-friendly (and not allergic to cat hair)
  
• no contagious angst, able to handle interpersonal issues constructively
  
• no life-stage conflicts (able to live and socialize harmoniously with mid-late twenty-something professional/grad student types)
  
• reasonably neat, at least as far as not getting in the way of other people goes (most chaos here is confined to personal spaces)
  
• tolerant of people (our friends include geek/poly/queer/just plain weird people)
  
• tolerant of the presence of meat in the kitchen
  
• doesn't mind ratatosk practicing the horn
  
• "funky" (or at the very least well-acquainted with the funk)

Abbie would also tolerate a second cat, if you have one, provided it plays well with others.

Let me know if you know of someone who would love this opportunity. It really is an awesome house, amazing location and we love it a lot, and we would enjoy continuing to love it with a brand-new housemate. You may even be able to move in halfway through November with pro-rated rent, but we'll discuss that if need be. Feel free to reply here or to rnoyes (at) gmail (doot) com.

Comments

[annilita.livejournal.com]

I would totally nominate my brother for this position, as he is funky in an asburger syndrom sort of way, tolernant of meat, and a lover of cats. Not to mention it would give me a spy on Mr. Abbie. But, alas, he has just started a new job in Northampton, and the commute would not be acceptable. Poop.

[phonemonkey.livejournal.com]

I wish I could. I loved your flat.

If you would like, antiquated_tory can put out an ad at his work, as their US office is based in Burlington. You'd at least get someone able to pay the rent and reasonably professional.

[phonemonkey.livejournal.com]

flat house

[spatch]

Thanks for the offer. Combined, ratatosk and I have a fairly wide social network, so we're looking for friends or friends-of-friends first before extending the search to a wider swath of the public.

But I'll let you and Tory know, and feel free to stop by again the next time you're across the Atlantic. :)

[mybadhairlife.livejournal.com]

I can second the one-way-street, quiet, security. I've been there on foot and by car and I'd never find it again without a specific map! (This is actually a good thing. Spatch can confirm that you don't want random Canadians just showing up at your door!!)

p.s. How DARE you put that damn song in my head! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! Ear worm terrorist!

[phonemonkey.livejournal.com]

Spatch can confirm that you don't want random Canadians just showing up at your door!!

If you and Andre are representative of Canada in general, then I'd be happy for random Canadians to show up at my door.

Anyway, thanks to your mix CD, I can always sing "The Log Driver's Waltz" at them if they turn nasty.

[eeka13.livejournal.com]

Ron Newman isn't Canadian.

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

$750 a month gets you your own house in Memphis, or a nice two-bedroom of your own, but you have to live in Memphis.

[spatch]

Aye, there's the rub.

Though if I had to pick a place in Tennessee to live, I'd certainly pick Memphis over, say, Nashville or Knoxville.

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

And we have a manatee in our river! Beat that, Charles!

Also Jeff Buckley.

[spatch]

Jeff Buckley's in the river?

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

No, I guess not. I still prefer to imagine him there, though--it's pretty much where our manatee is now.

Keith in Minnesota

[(Anonymous)]

Is there a Grue in the basement?

[luckimunki.livejournal.com]

Oh, man. I would totally seriously consider this, but I don't think I'd be able to do it by December. Still recovering from back surgery and whatnot. I did like your place, though. Even though I was melting. And living with Abby? That's a pretty sweet deal, damn it. Curses!