Count to ten

[spatch]

Hey gang, let's play the latest and greatest fun-time super game of all time:
WHY WON'T SPATCH'S CAR START?
And now, here's the host of WHY WON'T SPATCH'S CAR START, Linda Wertheimer! YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!


OH THANK YOU FOR THAT LOVELY INTRODUCTION AND WELCOME TO "WHY WON'T SPATCH'S CAR START", THE GAME SHOW WHERE OUR CELEBRITY PANEL AS WELL AS THE PLAYERS AT HOME TRY TO FIGURE OUT WHY SPATCH'S CAR WON'T START.

NOW I THINK YOU ALL KNOW THE RULES, SO LET'S START PLAYING! FIRST GUESS!


IZZIT THE BATTERY?


OH NICE GUESS BUT NO, IT IS NOT THE BATTERY. THAT'S ONE DOWN AND 14 TO GO.


IS IT WATER IN THE GAS LINE OR MAYBE IN THE CARBURETOR?


OH, SORRY. SORRY. NOT QUITE RIGHT. TWO DOWN, 13 TO GO.


IS IT, LIKE, THE ALTERNATOR?


NO YOU SHAMELESS POT SMOKING HUSSY, IT IS NOT, LIKE, THE ALTERNATOR, THREE DOWN AND 12 TO GO


IS IT BECAUSE SOMEONE POPPED HIS HOOD AND STOLE THE SPARK PLUG WIRES AND CAPS?


OH NO FAIR NORMAN FELL, YOU CHEATED


PWNED, BITCH


WELL, YOU JUST WON A FREE STAY AT THE PARKING SPOT ACROSS FROM THE GARAGE AND A FEW DAYS' WORTH OF WAITING TIL THE PARTS ARRIVE. THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE FOR PLAYING "WHY WON'T SPATCH'S CAR START", I'M LINDA WERTHEIMER SAYING, AS ALWAYS, FUCK YOU SOMERVILLE

Comments

[nathanjw]

Buncha blippity-blipping criminals in this town, I tell ya (he says, looking at the stereo-shaped hole in his console and window-replacement-shaped-hole in his wallet).