WHAT AM I DOING THIS GODDAMN INSTANT? WHY WOULD ANYBODY CARE?!

[spatch]

BELOW PLEASE FIND THE ONE SINGLE ENTRY I WOULD EVER MAKE ON TWITTER

spatch NOT USING TWITTER, THAT'S FOR GODDAMN SURE

OH BOY WE ARE RIDING THE SURFING EDGE OF WEB2.0 HUMOR HERE TODAY

and besides, let's face it, folks, the only reason you're refreshing that list is to catch the one person who put down "masturbating" and doesn't mean it as a joke.

Comments

[toonhead-npl.livejournal.com]

Ok I've read all the articles and I *STILL* don't grok what the big deal is with Twitter. Am I just some old lame fart?

[jossish.livejournal.com]

Ok, I had no idea what Twitter was so I went and looked. I am all about letting people know what's going on in my life via LJ and Facebook but: seriously? An entire site? Just for "what are you doing right now"? The fuck?

[toonhead-npl.livejournal.com]

Look at this quote from a Time magazine article:

And if you don't like it, well, in the words of one Twit from San Francisco, "I'm so sick to death of Twitter-haters. If you don't like it, why waste your time writing, reading, or talking about it? Sheesh."

[jossish.livejournal.com]

I don't like sexism either but that doesn't mean I shouldn't talk about it*! People are bizarre at taking criticism about stuff they like, huh?

*Deliberately over-the-top comparison.

The more I think about it the more I can kind of see how it would be useful if you needed to notify a big group of people about something which is what I use LJ and Facebook for - it was way quicker to tell most people I know that I got a job by changing my status and making a two line post than by calling everyone. But..."I'm having a coffee"? "I'm waiting for x?" Really? How does this impact on me?

Maybe we all just think everyone cares a lot more about our lives than they actually do! I personally want more detail than 140 characters though. Unless you're going to write a story with them like that example of "one pram for sale, unused", or whatever it is.

[minkrose]

I agree - though I will say that it's boring as hell to hear people complain about LJ. Aside from the fact that it's brought many incredible people into my life, I don't really care about why they don't like it, because I do.

Still, as long as they aren't complaining ON LIVEJOURNAL or incessantly in person, I don't mind (and yes,I've experienced both!).

anyway, I only really commented to say:
For Sale: Baby shoes. Never worn.
because it's one of my favourites.

[spatch]

Wasn't that the story Hemingway said was the best he ever wrote?
I love it.

[minkrose]

I can't find anything to specifically back that up (I'm not looking very hard), but that sounds right. Nevermind that personally, I've never read anything else by Hemingway that I actually liked.

it breaks my heart every time. so, so great.

[jossish.livejournal.com]

It's usually boring to hear people complain about anything you like! I just figure, free speech. I can tell 'em to shut up, etc etc.

And yay, thanks for clearing that up, I can never remember it and you'd think I would since it is pretty much the only thing Hemingway ever wrote that I like (ooh controversy).

[minkrose]

I've found I can't stand complaints that have no purpose - if you're venting to feel better or if you plan on doing something to fix the situation and talking it out helps, great. But if it's just to complain? Get over it.
I must be guilty of that (I try not to be) but it's something I find most frustrating in complaining people.

sure thing! and actually, I agree with you... I'm not a fan of his but that one is perfect.
Then again, I prefer the Brits over most Americans (uh, in terms of famous authors, and sometimes in general).

[spatch]

I sure hope they're calling themseves Twits without any trace of irony whatsoever.

[dskasak.livejournal.com]

Twitter is the "Short Attentions Span Theater" take on LJ.

[lexinatrix.livejournal.com]

That sounds like Hell. (It's other people, right?)

[limax.livejournal.com]

What's Twitter?

[ron_newman]

I think the answer to that is, "if you don't know, you're better off".

[spatch]

Twitter is a website for people who think you have this pressing need to know exactly what they're doing at any given moment.

I'm crossing the street!
I'm in line at CVS, waiting to buy adult diapers and suppositories!
I'm texting a message to Twitter telling you what I'm doing!
I'm getting shot while riding the Orange Line!

It appeals to a whole new level of vanity which the Web has yet to address, and only reinforces the feeling that hey, constant surveillance is cool! And fun! Even moreso when it's voluntary!

[minkrose]

perhaps this is guerrilla marketing for big brother? we're all doomed.

[toonhead-npl.livejournal.com]

reminds me of a funny New Yorker cartoon

[goldsquare.livejournal.com]

Love that cartoon.

PS I'm a dog.

[spritelord.livejournal.com]

Did Dia and I ever mention the time our El car was shot at? The windows were hit, twice.

It was, in fact, the Orange line.

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

Some of us use it for short-form artistic expression and the listing of new Googlewhacks (Babydaddy Gramma), in addition to our more mundane "Walking in Memphis. Through the FedEx Hub, to be precise." Also as a repository for our text-message haiku.

That doesn't mean you gotta like it, of course. Still, less obnoxious than MySpace.

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

Update. "Babydaddy Gramma" is not actually a Googlewhack unless you spell it wrong.

[invisibelle.livejournal.com]

The fact that I don't "get" Twitter does indeed make me feel old. Totally sympathize.

I dunno, you might like it maybe more than you think

[cropherb.livejournal.com]

This is kind of like what fancycwabs said, but I'll elaborate a bit further.

I find Twitter is one of those things that would be truly mundane to the point of uselessness if it were used simply as it is ostensibly designed to be, but which is much more fun when repurposed to surrealistic or otherwise zany effect. For other examples, compare setting the "Topic" in an IRC channel, an IM client status line, or something you'd put in .plan if anyone used finger anymore.

I realize, I may not really be succeeding in selling the thing here, but I've always appreciated those little opportunities to paste kind of brief and gentle digital graffiti for a relatively narrow yet not quite private audience. What Twitter really offers is a whole environment comprised entirely of that sort of quippage. In this respect it may not differ much from a bathroom wall, but at least for the moment (especially if you choose your friends list carefully) it is at least the bathroom wall in a café habituated by a rather witty, bright, and charming clientele.

http://twitter.com/notmydesk is a pretty good example of someone using Twitter to good effect, IMO. And of course there's also http://twitter.com/loresjoberg

no one knows my .plan

[spatch]

Since you took the time to write a bit more detailed response (and nice to see you 'round!) I might as well elaborate and in far less ALL CAPS, eh.

I can see your point in taking the thing and using it differently to suit your own crazy whims. That much is pretty cool and honestly, it's the best thing about technology and people. "You wrote it to do what? Well, I'm using it for this!"

And you're right; along that line, IRC topics are quite often repurposed for injokes, quote reminders, or anything but an actual description of the channel topic. (hooray for #ls!)

"Doing" lines on BBSes work the same way. Heck, even "Current Mood/Music" on LJ works along those principles.

But I am Mister Web2.0 Curmudgeon Mans, and am automatically leery of every single New Innovation Touted As The Brand New Latest And Greatest Thing That Will Change The Web Forever And Ever Amen. I'd rather let the users determine that than the breathless press releases or pie-eyed tech reporters, because it's the users who'll have to, uh, use it.

So the appeal of Twitter's initial purpose eludes me, but I guess that the "new generation" or whatever has no qualms throwing up their personal info on MySpace, posting videos of themselves all over YouTube, and letting everybody know exactly where they are and what they're doing at any given moment. The Web's always been about vanity, sure, and this is just another step in that evolution, but the step from "here's my CD collection and pictures of my cats" to "here's my current location" to even "here's where I'm standing right now, pinpointed directly on Google Earth" is quite a large, and frankly scary one.

Re: no one knows my .plan

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

I call shenanigans, Mister Flickr.

Also, if Twitter were really web 2.0 it would be spelled Twitr.

Re: no one knows my .plan

[spatch]

Put the broom down, Cap'n! Flickr turned out to be useful. It's a good photo-hosting service with a decent UI and some helpful organizational tools. When it was cloaked in that "Using Flickr will make your breath smell fresher!" verneer of vaguely-nebulous Web2.0 platitudes, the cheese factor was high. I'm not sure why these services need to plump themselves up so much. Once they got into the mode of saying "hey, this isn't going to change the future or end world hunger or anything, but it will help you organize your photos," they got the hint.

The hoopla surrounding Twitter is trumping up what's pretty much a stupid simple idea and implying that this is the future of the everything. I've been watching the first season of SNL and one of the recurring Weekend Update jokes has Chevy Chase in front of an inexplicably weird picture, such as a car half-sunk in a pool of mud or concrete, and Chevy starts in with a friendly-condescending "Well, college fads come and go, don't they?" (in the case of the car, it was trying to see how much oatmeal you could fit in a VW bug.)

Well, Web fads come and go, don't they?

At the time, they're a Real Big Deal, but let's keep it realistic here. Unless there's a good use for 'em, let them be used and enjoyed by those who like them and let 'em fade out into obscurity or whatnot (later, Orkut. Enjoy your new Brazilian friends.) Perhaps I'm just sick of the constant hyping up of every new silly web idea, especially after we were so recently burnt by the last time we hyped up every silly new web idea.

Does no one learn from the mistakes of their immediate predecessor anymore?

Re: no one knows my .plan

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

Oh hush. I'm only teasing.

Twitter's a toy; a communal toy, for sure--and a toy whose amusement value is directly related to the quality of the playmates with whom you choose to share it.

As such, if you follow people who have aspirations towards entertainment (Lore & Livingston, for instance, or Sifl and Juno), Twitter can be a remarkably amusing feed or c(h)at thread. If you follow the same real-life dullions who are posting "Thx 4 the add" in MySpace comments over and over, you're likely to get bored with it very easily, as the thread becomes a series of "At work...going to bed...watching TV..." ad nauseum.

You personally probably get twitter shoved at you more than other folks because you tend towards the entertaining and whimsical, and not the mundane obsession with your own dull viscera. An audience wants to be entertained, and having random Spatchiness delivered via SMS to a cell phone would be awesome.

But that's just me; I send out random amusing text messages to cell phones semi-regularly anyway, eliciting responses of "Who is this?" which is always nice.

Re: no one knows my .plan

[spatch]

I shoulda knowed!

I often send MBTA haiku to folks if I'm stuck on the train and have nothing else to do, but I make sure to only SMS people who are cool with it, and don't have to pay (or mind paying) to receive text messages cause the last thing I'd wanna do is cost you 10 whole cents to read THE DRUMMER FROM DEF LEPPARD'S ONLY GOT ONE ARM!

Re: no one knows my .plan

[fancycwabs.livejournal.com]

And were you to set up a twitter account, and copy it on the MBTA Haiku, the rest of us could read it as well, for nothing more than the social stigma of having a twitter account.

Again--my own take. I got an account to see if Lore could make what I thought would be terribly dreary mundane experience amusing, and indeed he has. As has pretty much everyone else I follow. Dave Neilsen, on the other hand, is all about eating lunch and talking on the phone.

[toonhead-npl.livejournal.com]

My biggest problem is the name is just so dumb. Besides I keep seeing it as "Tweeter" and wonder why the hell my sound system would need to know where I'm at.

[spatch]

Well, they do advertise a "boatload of know-how", and I'm assuming knowing where you're at would fit on that boat.

[fleep513.livejournal.com]

Have to add to the thread, my first thought was wtf is this for, who cares what all these people are doing. Then I got hooked into a couple of groups and I'm wishing the damned bbs crowd would twitter-in because I just don't have time to read pages and pages and pages of catch up even though I WANT to, but I can digest fun-size bites sprinkled liberally about my day.

*shrug* I don't see it as any more self-indulgent, meaningful or meaningless, interesting, boring, or otherwise questionable use of my time than LJ - it just takes up a hell of a lot less of it. I don't need two hours to figure out what my twitter-twerps are up to, but it just took me two hours to go through TWO DAYS of LJ posts to find out what's going on with the schwans.

Just do it. You'll be the first bona-fide twit-celebrity of the masses.

FUN N TWITS WITH YER OLE PAL SPATCH

sign me up.

[fourcoffees.livejournal.com]

I set mine to "Watching people put the twit in Twitter". Mocking others for using this seems to be the only use of it.